My Favorite Mistake-Celebrations and Next StepsAlexis Corona
Period 3/4 September 3, 2013 My Favorite Mistake Before I made my favorite mistake, I was going to an excellent school. The school was named Eastlake Middle, and to put it simply I loved it. The atmosphere there was great, including the people and teachers. That was until everyone started to get a boyfriend and since everyone was doing it, I also decided to do it. Which is very stupid now that I think of it because I did not even know what the meaning to a relationship was nor did I know what the definition of love was, which I swore I knew. And having to do the same as everyone else was even stupider. My friend got me to go out with a guy who also felt the desire to fit in, his name was Isaiah. To this day I still do not know why I dated him. He wasn’t very attractive, smart or even funny. I was just infatuated with the idea of having a boyfriend. But this “relationship” would soon come to an end when my dad found out. My friend and I were having a conversation when my dad overheard my friend mentioning Isaiah and saying he was “hideous” and I should break up with him. My father was infuriated, he was so mad he didn't let me go to school the next day. He even went to the point of taking me out of my dream school. My father sent me to a school that was the total opposite of Eastlake, there were fights everyday, and I met the worst people I’ve ever met there. The schools name was Montgomery Middle. The teachers were the worst part, they were rude and refer to us as “stupid” and would constantly tell us to “shut our mouths”. The four months I spent there, were the worst four months of my life. I can’t remember a day that I was happier than the day I got my acceptance letter to High Tech, it was like a gift from god. I didn’t have to endure the four years of High School at Montgomery High. If I never made that mistake I would’ve been attending Eastlake High, and who knows how I would’ve been doing in school. I think the choice I made was faith, and it lead me to High Tech. I am thankful I made that mistake, and that is why that is my favorite mistake. Glow - I really like the pacing of your story. You are able to tell the reader a lot of information in short, clear sentences and by staying focused on the topic. Grow - As a reader, I want to know more about why HTH is a good fit for you. I think the key to the mistake is where you ended up, and I didn’t get very much information about it. You have a lot to say, don’t rush to get to the end of your story. |
1. What are your strengths as a writer? What do you want to celebrate?One of my strengths in writing is being myself, I do not like to write in a different style other than mine. I am also very good at being short and simple.
2. What areas in which you can improve as a writer?One thing I need to work on is clarity, being more clear. I do not go indepth in my writing and leave the reader confused.
3. What goals do you have for yourself as a writer this year?One goal I have for myself this year, is to overcome my weaknesses in writing. The biggest weakness I would like to overcome is not going indepth.
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